“Every day is a new day. No need to dwell on the past. Look straight ahead.” St. Charlotte

Addiction is a chronic condition in which a person continues to use a substance or engage in a behavior despite harmful consequences. In life, there are two kinds of battles: external and internal. External battles involve struggles against outside forces such as other people or the environment. Internal battles take place within the mind. Both are real, but the most difficult is often the one within. It is the struggle against the thoughts and habits that hold us back from growth and from becoming our best selves. As an old cowboy rancher’s saying goes, “the greatest troublemaker you will ever face is the one you see in the mirror every morning.” Addiction is not simply a matter of weak willpower; it alters how the brain functions. For example, with alcohol dependence, the issue is not just how much someone drinks, but how alcohol affects their health, emotions, relationships, decision-making, and finances. Addiction and self-destructive behavior extend beyond the individual, impacting families and children who live with someone struggling with it. There are two primary types of addiction: substance-based and behavioral. Substance addiction includes alcohol, cannabis, amphetamines, cocaine, heroin, nicotine, and opioids, among others. Behavioral addictions include activities such as gambling, shopping, and compulsive sexual behavior. In behavioral addictions, individuals may lose control over their impulses, continuing the behavior despite negative consequences. Over time, repeated fantasizing and stimulation can make it increasingly difficult to resist urges as the brain becomes more deeply conditioned.

What Drives Addictive Behavior

The urge to avoid pain and seek pleasure is built into all living beings, including humans. At a biological level, we are wired to move away from discomfort and toward experiences that feel good. This means we instinctively avoid irritation and pain while pursuing comfort, relief, and pleasure. For example, eating a slice of cake is more immediately rewarding than skipping it. Even if we know it may be unhealthy, the pleasure we feel in the moment often outweighs the future consequences. The same pattern applies to many areas of life, when we face stress, emotional discomfort, or difficult situations. To cope, we turn to food, sleep, entertainment, or social distractions. When these no longer provide enough relief, some may seek stronger forms of escape, such as medication, alcohol, or drugs. Over time, this repeated cycle of avoiding pain and chasing immediate gratification can develop into addictive behavior.

Biology of addiction

To feel pleasure, our brain releases a chemical called dopamine. It’s what makes things feel good. This is part of the brain’s reward system. For example, when you eat something tasty, laugh with friends, or buy something you’ve always wanted, your brain releases dopamine as a reward. But that good feeling doesn’t last long, it fades quickly. When we keep doing things that release dopamine over and over, the brain starts to adjust by lowering its natural production of dopamine. For example, alcohol gives a quick dopamine boost, but the brain responds by reducing its own dopamine. At first, you may feel more pleasure, but over time, the brain produces less dopamine. As this continues, the “high” gets weaker and the process of addiction begins. The same activity doesn’t feel as good as it did before. This is why people need more drinks or more drugs to feel the same effect. Eventually, the brain becomes dependent on these dopamine spikes. When you suddenly stop addictive behavior, dopamine levels drop, causing cravings and urges that push you to go back to the habit just to feel normal again.

Tolerance

As we continue using an addictive substance or repeating a behavior, our body and mind begin to adapt to it. This is called tolerance. It means the same amount no longer gives the same feeling or comfort as before, so we need more of it to get the same effect. This is how tolerance develops over time.

Denial

The first step in overcoming addictive behavior is recognizing that an addiction exists. Many people tend to deny or justify their harmful habits. Denial is different from lying, it is an unconscious defense mechanism that helps shield us from the uncomfortable reality of addiction. It is like the “ostrich effect,” where an ostrich is said to bury its head in the sand to avoid danger. In everyday life, ostrich effects show up when people avoid checking their bank account after spending it heavily or when individuals with diabetes avoid monitoring their blood sugar levels.

Hitting Rock Bottom

A common belief is that we must “hit rock bottom” before we can quit an addictive behavior. But that isn’t true. We don’t need to lose our family, job, health, or freedom, or experience a complete collapse of our lives before we decide to change. In reality, “rock bottom” is simply the point at which we choose to change and improve. Real change often begins with a shift in how we see ourselves and our situation. This usually comes through self-reflection and honest self-examination. At first, self-reflection may be mostly intellectual, simply thinking and recognizing what is happening. But when those thoughts are combined with strong emotions, they become deeply felt and real. That is when it “hits us,” and we feel we have had enough. From that moment, change can begin. To start the process of change, we must reach a point when staying the same becomes more painful than changing. We also need to open ourselves to the feeling that change brings relief, growth, and a better life.

Decision to Quit

Many people try to stop negative behavior by simply forcing themselves to take control. But as many have discovered, this approach rarely works on its own. Real change usually begins when you raise your standards and become truly disturbed by where you are and when you reach a point where you feel “enough is enough.” At this stage, not changing starts to feel more painful than staying the same, and change begins to feel like a greater future. Next, you need to create urgency and make a clear decision to quit. After that, it’s important to commit to the process and not give up easily, giving yourself a real chance to heal and recover. Choosing to quit means understanding that sobriety is more than just abstaining. It’s a commitment to being clean physically, mentally, and emotionally. A sober person respects their body and avoids smoking, narcotics, and other harmful substances.

Triggers

To quit, we must first identify the triggers that lead to urges and cravings. Both people and places can act as negative triggers. Other common triggers include an argumentative attitude, fatigue, loneliness, boredom, irritability, sadness, worry, frustration, self-pity, blaming others, and guilt. One of the most powerful triggers, however, is being around people with harmful character traits. These are individuals who show negative behavior, unhealthy habits, and poor influence.

Detox

After quitting, individuals who are addicted must first go through a detoxification process for both the mind and body. Detoxification is the natural process of allowing the body to eliminate drugs or alcohol and begin restoring itself. Depending on how severe and long-lasting the addiction is, detox can be done at home or must be under close medical supervision.

Withdrawal

Once a person stops using a substance, withdrawal symptoms can begin almost immediately. The severity of withdrawal can vary, and several factors may influence how intense it becomes, including:

• The intensity and duration of the addiction

• A serious medical condition, such as unstable diabetes or severe high blood pressure

• Liver disease

• Existing mental health disorders

• A history of severe withdrawal episodes

• Recent surgery

• Use of other drugs or narcotics

 Withdrawal generally progresses through four main stages:

Stage I: The brain becomes highly active and unsettled, often leading to racing thoughts, tremors, and physical shaking (“jitters” or “shakes”). Anxiety, irritability, and restlessness are common.

Stage II: Some individuals may experience hallucinations, meaning they see, hear, or feel things that are not actually present. This can include disturbing dreams or nightmares. A common symptom is formication, the sensation of insects crawling on or under the skin.

Stage III: About one in four individuals may develop seizures or convulsions. During a seizure, the body loses control of movement and consciousness may be temporarily lost.

Stage IV: The most severe stage is known as delirium tremens (DTs). This occurs in roughly 5% of cases. The person may appear awake but become severely confused, agitated, and may experience hallucinations, delusions, heavy sweating, rapid heartbeat, and dangerously high blood pressure. DTs are a medical emergency, and without prompt treatment, they can be fatal in a significant number of cases.

Urges and Cravings

After detoxification, when urges and cravings begin to surface, it is important not to become passive or settle into comfort. Relaxation in those moments can strengthen the craving by allowing the same neural pathways to continue firing. Instead, the goal is to interrupt the pattern through immediate physical action. Therefore, do not relax. Relaxation can reinforce the craving cycle in the brain.

Relapse

Even for those who have successfully stayed away from addictive behaviors, there are times when old patterns may reappear. This is known as relapse. However, there is an important difference between relapse and a slip. A relapse occurs when a person gives up and returns fully to previous negative behaviors. A slip, on the other hand, is a single lapse in behavior, after which the person can regroup, regain control, and continue moving forward. A slip does not mean that every setback must lead to a full return to old habits or serve as an excuse to abandon progress. When examined closely, a slip can serve as a useful indicator. It highlights areas that may need further attention and helps identify triggers that require awareness and improvement.

Support Groups

Support groups are casual meetups for people dealing with substance use or behavioral addictions who want encouragement from others with similar experiences. Most are free or ask for small donations. They typically meet regularly, either in person or online, where participants listen to others’ stories and share strategies that have helped them. While support groups aren’t a substitute for therapy, many people find them helpful alongside professional counseling or medical care.

WHAT IS ADDICTION

• Take a pen and paper and write down your thoughts.

• Start by listening to the audio session, then watch the short video(s).

WARNING: The content on this page is provided for informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional medical advice. You acknowledge and agree that you should consult a licensed healthcare provider before quitting or beginning the detoxification process.

PREPARATION

GUIDED SESSION

Use headphones for optimal sound

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